Tesserz has thoughts on this?? BELIEVE IT.

ALRIGHT. I'm back.

B has been on my case about my lack of postings, and he's right -- I've been terrible. And I've dearly missed all 1 of you readers out there. But while I hate to come back to the blog world with a mini-economy-rant, that's where my mind's at right now. So let's do this, Tesserz -- but keep it short and sweet.

Now, to be fair, I am not the leading authority on the economy, believe it or not -- I leave the aneurysms to Jim Cramer. BUT, I do know a few things, and here's what they are.

1. The bailout would help temporarily, but our economy is in such general bad shape that much more drastic changes need to take place. The bailout's like a band-aid on an economy that needs surgery.

2. This current situation is what happens when people get greedy and/or thoughtless ... it catches up with you. People in our country think that they can buy things when they don't have the money -- that's why credit cards & leases & "no down payments!" exist. You have to be careful out there. And when most of the country isn't being careful, this is what happens.

3. The bailout would put private businesses in the hands of the government, and Karl Marx would be proud (<-- great article). I think we all know how communism works. It's a good idea -- actually a GREAT idea -- but impractical and oppressive. Let's keep this free market a free market.

4. I was talking with my parents about this situation, and my mom, who used to work in the stock market in the 80s, mentioned that the Dow Jones was around 2,000 points back then. If we went up some points, it was good -- if we went down some, it wasn't a huge deal. But now, our greedy economy has grown into an average of 10,000 points ... so maybe going down 700 points is actually not a bad thing. If everyone is willing to take a few cuts to make up for our behavior, we could get back to a healthier economy.


It's funny -- When people have more, they are less willing to give any of it up. And they freak out & look for a quick-fix if something goes slightly wrong. Maybe we could all get used to having a little less, and we might all become more level-headed people.

Go Irish

Okay so last weekend, I had the craziest time trying to get back to the city in which I looked. Twice, I was driving back from my hometown and received a call that my work had no power. Wanting to spend a ton more time with my lovely girlfriend, I turned around and headed back both times. I came home just in time on night number one to hear Carlos Zambrano of the Cubs toss a no hitter. It was awesome. Just a day earlier, I saw the Irish dismantle Michigan.

What could be better than that, you ask?

High GMAT score, ND wins, Cubs Clinch the division. Bring it on, Saturday, September 20th.

Blogging Drunk

So I guess it goes without saying that my esteemed co-blogga was wasted yesterday when she pondered about ellipses. Man, who would do such a thing? Sober I mean. I mean sober.

Well, I guess that makes sense that she was drinking. It was a day ending in "day."

PERIOD

I cannot expound for too long on my use of the ellipses. I have frequent pauses in thought. Plus, when you're reading, I like to give you guys a bit of a cue. Consider the ellipses a stage direction, as if I, the director, am telling you, the actor, where exactly to pause for comedic effect.

For example.

This doesn't work: Hello...my friend.

This does work: You know what I love the best? ... Boobies

Gah. Already shirking my responsibilities to those with a higher frame of mind.

I pause my thoughts frequently so my voice can catch up

Ellipses: A three-point reflection

B apparently has an ellipses fetish.  And I question this motive.

Please note the three periods in each of his post titles.  Is he trying to tell us something?  B, speak to us.

Why the ellipses?  Is there something being omitted, and you choose to express this through proper MLA format?  Is this just a mental pause?  Or do you simply like to decorate your sentences with fashionable polka dots?  All are legitimate.  But which is the ultimate truth?

I'd like to take a moment to examine each.

First, the grammatical approach.  The official MLA handbook states that "whence a quip be too extravagant, the source-citer mayeth omit the less important information via three elegant stops."  This is a real quote.  Please do not check the source.  But I suggest that this is not B's reasoning.  What could he possibly be omitting from that Austin Powers' quote that isn't funny enough to be repeated in a post?  Exactly.

Second, a mental pause.  The most likely, and obviously the most correct.  The ellipses denote a true passing of time in speech, so beautifully articulated through three consecutive periods.  This approach relays B's relatability, making him a "speaking author".  So wise. So functional. So real.

Third, fashionable polka dots.  A girl can dream.

B, keep up the good work.  I truly love the ellipses, and it's taken all my feminine power not to use them myself.  And no, that wasn't a menstrual reference.

Capitalize...really

And by the way, what the HELL happened to Capital One commercials. These used to be pure gold. Then they went to just acceptable. Now the "card lab" is just plain lame. Money wasted, guys. Money wasted.

Allow Myself to introduce...myself

My name is Richie Cunningham and this is my wife...oPRAH.

Just kidding guys. That's a line from Austin Powers. My real wife is much better looking than the girl in that movie. And Oprah. Even not-fat Oprah

I went to a lecture by Nicholas Sparks one year at Notre Dame and he said the best way to improve your writing isn't by reading, but by writing. So this blog will allow all of us to get better at writing, since I'll be writing, and you won't be reading it. This should come as no surprise to me, an author of many blogs that just fall off the face of the earth due to lack of readership. I don't blame them. I stopped being funny and started being really serious sometimes. I got even borderline depressing. But no worries anymore. Workin Blue, along with my other blog, is the only baby I have. The title of this one comes from the phrase used to define the act by comedians and humor artists of lowering their humor to a profane and disgusting level in order to garner laughs. This is a cheap trick, one that I despise entirely. It's so easy to be funny if all you're doing is playing to the most immature part of someone. It takes a real man to make jokes about high society things like the current national polo rankings and those silly butlers who still refuse to put the dessert utensil at top of the place setting. Oh, Bartholomew!

So COME ON PEOPLE. Read this blog. Get a taste of what real people think of fake issues. Like the difficulties of cooking steaks WITHOUT A BROILING PAN. Or the trials and tribulations of someone with quadracep tendonitis. Or...NOT BEING ABLE TO STAY UP PAST 11!

And, you know, if this doesn't work, we'll just talk about boobs.