1) Tessa wears boxer-briefs on more than one occasion during any given week
2) In order to become more famous, Tessa pulled a Tracy Jordan and bought the entire 9 minutes of ad space during a show dedicated entirely to her posture.
3) Tessa once scored a 1 on an entire 18 hole miniature golf course
4) Speaking of miniature golf, she was the brainchild behind the mini-golf course used in Happy Gilmore. That course is called "The Brut" and spelled with an umlaute over the "u" like that cologne.
5) Tessa once asked Michael Jordan for his autograph, but he declined, refusing to give one to a girl who wasn't wearing a shirt.
6) In the future, Tessa kills OJ Simpson and is acquitted in the most ironic criminal trial ever
7) Her favorite animal? The boar from Lord of the Flies
8) You know this one's true because I don't particularly like it about her, but Tessa was the marketing genius who invented the concept of specific sports themed advertising during prominent sporting seasons. During this March Madness, you can thank her for all the insurance companies offering their services to help you "defend against the fast break" or "score a winning bucket." Interestingly enough, she first started this concept in India during cricket season.
9) She invented using "boner" as a way to describe a huge screw up, but laughs every time she says it
10) She's built up a tolerance for the drowsiness inducing drug found in most anti-histamines
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